She Reads Truth

Hey guys,

This week I started a bible study with a blog I recently discovered. I am just amazed and excited about the things I have been learning and reading this week! The bible study is on the book of Proverbs. Each day we read a chapter in Proverbs and there is a daily post that goes along with it. There is plenty of opportunity for discussion on the blog and fb page. Everyone is super welcoming and encouraging, so if you are like me and have been looking for a way to better discipline yourselves, you might want to check this out. We are currently on Day 5, but this plan is very flexible and easy to catch up.





<3 anna

Good Stuff!

Hello to all my bloggy friends out there!

I'm feeling especially happy today! So I thought I would put that perkiness to good use and update you on a few happenings. I recently wrote a blog discussing some personal truths that I wanted to live by and work on. If you haven't, check out that blog here:
http://annaleviner13.blogspot.com/2011/07/realizations.html

First off, don't you wish you were here, chilling with these penguins?!

This week I was able to catch up with a friend who was very encouraging. She knows my desire to get started in the medical field and was able to give me a few helpful pointers. I am now looking into a job shadowing program at my local hospital and have already started talking with a lady who works at a nearby hospice. My friend volunteered at a hospice and is now working for them. So I'm hoping this could turn into a potential job opportunity or if nothing else give me more experience. My friend also told me that the hospices are in great need of administrative and clerical help. These are areas that I really enjoy and would love to get more hands on experience in. I'm also interested in the patient care stuff, but am leaning more towards the clerical work. I think that would be more beneficial to me, since I'm studying Medical Transcription. Just curious, but do any of my reader's know anything about this field or some helpful tips?

Speaking of Medical Transcription, I am half way through the Anatomy part of my program...exciting stuff! I'm currently studying The Urinary and Endocrine systems...not so exciting...so far my least favorite chapters... :/

The cleaning and organization has slowed down this week. I'm currently looking at an evil pile of clothes that need to be folded and other chores that have been neglected...gotta hop to it. Caroline (She was the flower girl in my wedding) is coming to visit this weekend. I'm very excited about her visit. I bought us some face masks and we are going to have a girly night tomorrow and more fun to follow. I'll try to remember to take pictures. (Another thing I need to be more intentional with) and will update you all on that on Monday. :)

So life is good. I'm doing my very best to cherish every day and each moment. I know I'm not the best at that, but I'm learning. Hope you all are having a wonderful day and be sure to take some time to enjoy the good things around you. :)

<3 Anna

Realizations

This month I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life. It is always fascinating to have an epiphany, but it gets an added kick when you have several all at once. I was talking to John about that today and he suggested me writing them down. (They were becoming too overwhelming to process)

So I made a little list with short sentences summarizing my thoughts. These were some very private realizations, so I won't share them all here, but I will say that I can see God working in my life.

1. I'm incredibly hard on myself. This isn't really news to me, but I'll explain.

Yesterday, I called my grandmother to talk about visiting on Sunday. We also talked about what was going on with my great-grandparent's and life in general. (For those who don't know, most of my life I lived within walking distance of my grandparents) During this conversation, I heard my grandmother call herself stupid, crazy, and any other negative thing you can think of. Now I'm not suggesting that the reason I'm a negative person is because of my grandmother or family. What I am saying is that your environment does effect you. I have had my husband and friends tell me that I'm negative, that I'm too hard on myself, and that I'm my own worst enemy. I always knew this was true, but never admitted it. It took hearing my grandmother say those horrible things about herself for me to realize that I do the exact same thing and far too often. We both criticize ourselves when we make minor mistakes. We both criticize ourselves when we don't feel confident in what we are saying or we are not sure we are conveying it properly. It's a vicious cycle. I really want to work harder to break it. I don't want my children or my children's children dealing with this issue. I know that there will be bad days, but I believe there is power in positive thinking.

2. I'm growing up.

As each year passes, I find myself growing more and more intolerant to drama. I don't have the time or energy to deal with people starting drama, getting mad over the little things, people getting mad at me for not acting/doing what they want, issues of the past, etc. I love to make people happy and I love to help people, but I refuse to let people steal my joy. If the things that make others happy leave me feeling walked on...I'm sorry, you have got to go. I don't need that in my life. I can and will be a good friend to you, but I can only take being burnt for so long.

3. I need more discipline in my life.

If you could get inside my head, I think you would see one of those bouncy balls constantly bouncing all over the place. This would represent all of my crazy, (but I think good ideas) my problem is I don't know how to make the ball stop and actually get something done. I would love to learn how to focus all of my energy on each task as it comes. I would love to be able to become productive and do all of the things I enjoy.

4. I want to live more by the golden rule. (within reason and not to cross out #2)

I love helping people and I do my best to respect everyone that I come in contact with. Usually if I don't I have a good reason. The world has hardened me, so I have to work much harder than I used to on this one.

5. I want to not care what people think of me.

This is a BIG one! I don't know why I put so much stock in what others think, but I want to learn how to stop that. I want to have such confidence in me and see myself as God does. I think then and only then will I beat this one.

6. I really want to be intentional with everything.

This has been my goal for much of the year. I want to make stronger efforts to pursue the things I love in life. I want to have the peace of knowing that I'm doing the things I love and really living life.

So these are some of the things that I've realized and am working on. Do any of you struggle with these? Any suggestions? Comments?

<3 Anna

Think Right, Live Right

This is my devotion for today, thought I would share.

Today's Truth

"Think about the things that are good and worthy of praise. Think about the things that are true and honorable and right and pure and beautiful and respected" (Philippians4:8, NCV).

Friend To Friend

I was absolutely pathetic as I moaned and groaned my way up the stairs. My back was killing me! I had just spent four long hours taking down Christmas decorations, packing them in boxes, hauling each box down three flights of stairs to the basement and hoisting every one of those heavy, packed-to-the-brim boxes up on shelves that are taller than I am. Do you get the painful picture?

I was working up a stellar case of self-pity when my husband came home from work and asked what I had been doing all day. "I did two loads of laundry, wrote two devotions, took care of Justus while Danna studied, answered email and then it took me four hours to take down all of the Christmas decorations," I declared in my best "poor me" voice. Dan did not seem impressed. "It really took you that long? I didn't think you had that many decorations out this year. Why didn't you wait until I got home so I could help you? " he asked. I didn't want to wait. I was not happy ... and more than a little upset with him for not being more sympathetic. But my sweet husband was not done.

"Your problem is not in your back, honey. Your problem is in your mind," he patiently explained. I could see the conversation going down the tube fast but managed to muster up just enough self-control that kept me from saying what I really wanted to say. Instead, I sweetly asked, "What do you mean?"

Sidebar: Three months ago, I was in a car wreck that caused some fierce muscle spasms in my back and resulted in several visits to the chiropractor. Two months ago I had a stomach virus that lasted a week followed by the Thanksgiving holidays during which we had our kids and grandkids for a week ... which was incredibly wonderful and deliciously chaotic. The day they left, I went to the doctor with a respiratory infection that turned into bronchitis that soon blossomed into walking pneumonia from which I am still recovering. Do you feel my pain?

"Honey, you have been so sick - not to mention being rear-ended by a car going 70 miles an hour. Why did you feel like you had to decorate the entire house in the first place?" Dan asked. I know. I could not believe it either! "It was Christmas!" I sputtered in frustration. And then I saw it. The problem really is in my mind. I had allowed wrong thinking to dictate wrong priorities.

The mind is a great battlefield. The Bible tells us that we have the mind of Christ because we have a personal relationship with Him, but we still have to allow or choose to "let" the mind of Christ be in control. Every day we are at war for the control of the mind. Who wins that war is up to us and the choices that we make.

Proverbs 23:7 tells us, "For as he thinks within himself, so he is" (NASB). In other words, what we think about powerfully influences who and what we will become. Our actions, our attitudes and habits are born in the mind, an offspring of the thought life we entertain.

We can literally change our life by changing how we think - but we cannot do it alone. God's standard and guideline for our thought life is very clear and demanding. In fact, it's completely impossible without God's power at work in our life.

"Think about the things that are good and worthy of praise; think about the things that are true and honorable and right and pure and beautiful and respected" (Philippians 4:8, NCV).

We choose what we watch and read, the conversations we have and the time we spend in the Word. If the mind is not filled with good, trust me, the enemy will fill it with bad. The human mind will always set itself on something. Paul is challenging us to wisely choose that setting, taking charge of our thoughts by inviting the Holy Spirit to empower God's standard for the mind.

My husband often says, "You can't keep a bird from flying over your head but you can keep it from building a nest in your hair." Now stay with me. Impure and wrong thoughts will come but we do not have to entertain them and invite them to "come on in and stay awhile." When we choose to surrender the control of our mind to God, He will honor that choice and give us the strength and power to think right. And when we think right - we will live right.

Let's Pray

Lord, I confess to You that I often struggle with the way I think. I desperately need Your help. Please make me aware of the influences that draw my mind away from You and show me how to avoid each one. Teach me how to fix my thoughts on You and give me a hunger and thirst for Your Word. Today, I surrender the control of my mind to You, Father. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Now it's your Turn

The mind is the control center of your life. How have your thoughts affected your decisions or actions this week? I challenge you to fill your mind with God's Word and watch God work in your life. Read the following questions and record your answers in your journal.
What specific steps do I need to take in order to put more of God's word into my mind?

To honor God with my thought life, what changes do I need to make in the following areas?

Movies ___________________________________________

Television_________________________________________

Music ____________________________________________

Books____________________________________________

Magazines ________________________________________

Internet___________________________________________

Conversations______________________________________

<3 Anna

Goals for 2011

Hey everyone,

It's the start of a new year, a time when many are thinking of new years resolutions. I've seen many posts on facebook and blogs talking about resolutions or goals people are setting this year.

I've decided to set goals for the new year. I want to see growth and progress and I want to have more endurance. I hope that when failure comes my way, which it inevitably will, I'll be more prepared to dust myself off and get up and start anew.

Here are my goals for the new year:

I want to grow spiritually, mentally, and physically.

Spiritually- I want to spend more time this year praying, reading the Word, meditating on the Word, and in general growing a deeper relationship with God.

Mentally- This month I will start my new job of tutoring. This is one way I hope to achieve this goal. In order to do well at this job, I will have to be well versed in whatever subject matter my student needs help in. I also plan to read more on topics of interest fiction and especially non-fiction.

Physically- I want to live a healthier life style so I can be well and feel well. My mom is allowing me to use her tread mill and John recently got me Jillian Michael's 2010 work out for the wii. I can't wait to get my workout schedule hammered out. John and I also hope to have a healthier and happier puppy, so more walks with Sophie will be another benefit. :)

I want to read and write more.

My plan at the end of the year is to be able to say that I've read 50 books. I also hope to review many of these books. As far as writing goes, I plan to look for freelance work and continue writing for my blogs.

I want to worry less and enjoy each moment.

My plan is to make more time to reflect and have quiet time. More time to just be. I'm going to practice praying more and worrying less.

I want to spend more time with the people I love.


So what are your resolutions/goals for the new year? How do you hope to achieve these resolutions/goals?

<3 Anna

Update

So my mom got the apartment. It will be an adjustment, but I'm happy for her. John and I will be helping her move after Christmas. My dad is still popping in and out of the picture. I wish he could get all of his stuff in one trip. I just wish this whole thing could move more quickly for my mother and sister's sakes.

I feel kinda sad because it seems that my dad was the final straw for me. I feel like I'm growing dark and wrapping up into my self again. It's safe here. I especially don't feel comfortable with men. I'm withdrawing even from John right now. It's frustrating. I could give you a long list of all the men that have failed me in my life, but I think you get the point.

The good thing is that most days I don't give in. I fight the stupid voices in my head that are my worst enemy. Another good thing is that I'm determined that 2011 will be my year. I have things I want to do with my life and I want to be more intentional. I feel like that is my theme for the new year. If nothing else I can say that I'm hopeful. I guess that is how I'm staying together and not coming completely undone.

Just breathe

I'm trying to just breathe today. I can't change the things that have happen. What I can do is pray. I will continue to do this and try to be an encouragement to others.

Lord, give me strength.

A beautiful Saturday

Hey everyone!

I'm updating as promised. Saturday was an amazing day! I went to a woman's luncheon at my mom's church. I was a little skeptical about it at first, but was pleasantly surprised:)

I was blessed to meet two of the most amazing women. Darlene Ballard and her friend, Janice. Darlene was the guest speaker and shared her testimony and about her book "Love of A Different Kind." (Which she generously signed and gave me a copy of) Janice also shared her amazing testimony and was there selling some beautiful jewelry. (She gave me 2 beautiful rings and a gorgeous pair of earrings.)

It wasn't that these gifts were free, it was the generosity and God-filled spirit about these two wonderful women. I've never met anyone that showed the love of Christ, like these women. They helped me to see God as very REAL and TANGIBLE. They helped me out of a three month depression that was looming over me and truly killing my spirit. They helped me to feel like God's daughter again, beautiful and precious. All I can say is, thank you God for sending me such wonderful people to help me through the darkness. Also if anyone ever ask about my jewelry, I have a beautiful story, I can share:)

If you would like to learn more about Darlene and her ministry, here's a link: www.darleneballard.com

***Be on the look out for a review on "Love of a Different Kind" COMING SOON to my reviews blog***

<3 Anna

"So You're Thinking About Being a Teacher"

So I was just looking through my blogs and realized that I hadn't updated about something very important in my life. Here recently, I have really been considering going to school for education. I'm very passionate about learning and I've been tutoring a lady in vocabulary for a few weeks now. I look forward to my time with her each week. She is a very special lady.

I've also decided to take the teaching thing slow, I have a tendency to jump head first into something I'm excited about and then when it's not what I wanted...I become very disappointed. So I finish school in June, I'm planning to take a year off after that to work and hopefully get in with the local school system to substitute teach to see if this is really the path I want to go down. As far as schools go, I'm really considering Piedmont College. I know that it is a great school in education and if I went there John and I would probably move to Demorest, so it would be a new place with new experiences...being near the mountains doesn't hurt either;)If you pray, please pray for me on this, it's a very important decision and I want to do what God wants me to do. Thanks!

Healing

So in my past entries I mentioned my biological dad and wondering about him...well to all my readers out there....lesson learned: Be careful what you ask for. I know, I have briefly mentioned interning with the Sparrows Nest in Athens...anyway, he came in there a few times in the past couple of weeks. I had my suspicions that he was homeless, because of things my mother had told me...I also knew there was a possibility that he could be in Athens...but to come face to face with him and have to keep up a professional demeanor was pretty daunting. I think I handled myself pretty well...but it was very awkward and I did not speak with him. So anyway, I got my answers on that front, and I asked my mother his parent's names---so I have those if I ever decide to track down my ancestry. It was pretty interesting to me how all this came about, but God works in mysterious ways.

Moving right along, the past few weeks for me have been filled with great emotions. I've experienced, I believe some of my more stronger moments as well as my more vulnerable ones. God has felt more alive to me than ever. It's a great thing to experience. I feel that I truly am where I need to be right now, and I haven't found that sort of comfort in a long time.

One final side note: My mom had her cat scan Thursday. The doctor does not think its a tumor, but he wants to see her next month. Right now her ear looks better, pray it continues to heal.

Quick Update and Thoughts

Sorry for the bit of a hiatus. Here's a brief list of what I've been up to:

* Started my internship with the Sparrow's Nest. I'm liking it for the most part, just very much ready for my time in school to be over. I'm ready to work for awhile and see where God takes me.

*John and I have planted some flowers around the house and are finishing up (hopefully) with the vegetable garden this evening.

* I've been really down lately, so I've been doing some things to help lift my spirits...journaling, working on a workout schedule, etc.

*I really have been in a creative-crafty mood lately...just not sure what I want to do with that...any suggestions?

* I feel that I need to say: don't ever underestimate the power of prayer. I, as well as some of my friends have been hit very hard with various life circumstances...but God will see us through.

Seasons of Life

Spring is finally here! I love it for the most part- the beautiful sunny days, the warm weather, cute baby animals, etc. The one bad thing about spring is all the new plants that grow, don't get me wrong they are beautiful---BUT my nose and head hate them...yep, spring also brings about allergy season:/

So I was thinking this morning about how seasons are a lot like life. We have the beautiful spring and summer moments and also the dreary fall and winter moments. The neat thing about this just as there are good things in spring, summer, winter, and fall. There are also good things in life.

Wouldn't it be great if we could look at life like the seasons?! For example, Winter is bitter cold and everything is bare, but look at the beautiful snow and many an animal is happy for that hibernation time.

Each season has some good, just as each day brings forth opportunity and growth, as well as those good happy moments we seek out. So if we could focus more on those happy summery moments and less on the dreary wintery moments---I'm pretty sure, life would be a lot more enjoyable. Just a thought:)

What's your favorite season? Give a positive and negative thought about that season, if you would like:)