Healing

So in my past entries I mentioned my biological dad and wondering about him...well to all my readers out there....lesson learned: Be careful what you ask for. I know, I have briefly mentioned interning with the Sparrows Nest in Athens...anyway, he came in there a few times in the past couple of weeks. I had my suspicions that he was homeless, because of things my mother had told me...I also knew there was a possibility that he could be in Athens...but to come face to face with him and have to keep up a professional demeanor was pretty daunting. I think I handled myself pretty well...but it was very awkward and I did not speak with him. So anyway, I got my answers on that front, and I asked my mother his parent's names---so I have those if I ever decide to track down my ancestry. It was pretty interesting to me how all this came about, but God works in mysterious ways.

Moving right along, the past few weeks for me have been filled with great emotions. I've experienced, I believe some of my more stronger moments as well as my more vulnerable ones. God has felt more alive to me than ever. It's a great thing to experience. I feel that I truly am where I need to be right now, and I haven't found that sort of comfort in a long time.

One final side note: My mom had her cat scan Thursday. The doctor does not think its a tumor, but he wants to see her next month. Right now her ear looks better, pray it continues to heal.

Hanging in There

I have this overwhelming feeling that the best is yet to come. This sounds wonderful, but when you are in the "yet to come" part of it, it doesn't feel so great. I have a lot to look forward to, but need to have the motivation to enjoy each day. It's been very hard lately, I don't really know why. I don't think I'm depressed, I think I more restless than anything else. One thing I know that would help is to start exercising again...I get in ruts with that:/ So yeah, that's what's been on my mind.

Follow up on the bf: I found out his middle name and am wondering if it would be worth looking into one of those tracker sites to find out where he is...I'm not a stalker...I just wonder if this would better help my ancestry questions.

Scars from my Past

Happy St. Patrick's Day everyone!

That's not really what this blog will be about, but I didn't say it in the first...so there you have it;)

So lately, I've been thinking about my biological father. (for those who don't know my biological father left when I was 4 and sorta came back into my life when I was 13 and then left again. A real winner.) Anyway, even though he gave up his rights to me at 13, I still wonder where he is and what he is doing with his life. I've also wondered because the last I heard he was living in Athens and that's where I live now. It's weird to think I could have walked right by him and not even known it.

This also relates back to St. Paddy's Day because I do wonder about my heritage. I wonder about my ancestry...especially with his side of the family. I know about some of my mom's ancestors, but nothing about my bf. I've been wanting to google his name to find out some stuff, but something keeps holding me back. I also hate to admit it, but I don't even know his middle name. I could easily ask my mom, but I hate the awkwardness that comes with those conversations. So I'm left at a cross roads not sure if I should even tap at the surface of this one. Any thoughts?